Lilly & Christina
by Trinity005
Summary: Everything has a reason... the younger years of sisters Lilly and Christina Rush.
1. A Cold Day in Philadelphia

"**Lilly & Christina"**

Summary: Everything has a reason… the younger years of sisters Lilly and Christina Rush.

Spoilers: Anything that has already been mentioned on the show can be here.

Disclaimer: You know that one: I don't own them.

Author's note: Reviews are very appreciated. Feel free to be really honest, I can take it. I'd welcome suggestions too.

I'm beginning with two chapters about Lilly's mom. I'm sorry if it's too descriptive and detailed. I promise more action in chapter 3 and on.

Chapter 1 – "A Cold Day in Philadelphia"

It was the worst winter in Philadelphia in the last 10 years. Ellen Rush was walking home after a day of work. Those cold days made her skin even paler that it already was. Her long, dark blond hair was in a ponytail, like she wore it everyday. Ellen's big brown eyes were shinier that they used to be, but it wasn't because she was happy. It was the effect of the tears that she was fighting against, since she left the department store where she worked as a saleswoman. She'd been laid off.

"The sales have been coming down more and more in last months," was the explanation from the department store manager, "we'll have to cut down on employees." Just like that, with no previous warning.

She tried to explain how much she needed that job. "I'm sorry, Mrs. Rush," was the only answer she got. She sighed, her heart was beating slowly, all the air she breathed wasn't enough for all the things that were coming to her mind at that moment.

She walked out of the store with her friend and co-worker – also laid off - Jane Martin. The wind was cold and it was starting to snow.

"Don't worry, Ellen. We'll find something else soon." Jane tried to cheer her up.

"Oh, Jane, let's be realistic. All stores and factories are firing people. We're not going to find anything."

"Come on! You can't think like that. You gotta have positive thinking."

Ellen laughs. "Yeah. I'd like to see you saying that if you a baby growing inside of you."

Jane is at first speechless. "Oh my God Ellen… this is great but… is Michael working now? Does he now about the baby?"

"No… he lost his job two weeks ago. And I don't think this is the best time to tell him that in 6 months we'll have a very expensive little human being living with us."

"Gosh, Ellen, I'd like to say I could help you, but I really can't. In 3 months behind on my house's rent."

"Don't worry. I'll figure something out." She said with a very sad smiled and turned away, to walk home.

As she walked, the cold wind against her skin, she started thinking. The last two years after she married Michael hadn't been easy. But they loved each other. It was such a strong and fulfilling love that made them forget all the problems they had. Times were hard and none of them could keep a job for more than 6 months, but they had each other.

And now they had this baby. She dreamt about this moment since she could remember. Holding her little baby in her arms, with Michael by her side, on their big house, the perfect American family… "why life never turns out the way we dream it?" She thought, as she arrived at the building she lived. It was a 4-floor building, an old construction, in very poor conditions. On the street, hookers and drug addicts shared the sidewalks. No parent would raise a kid in Kensington Avenue.

* * *

To be continued 


	2. An Angel Named Lilly

Chapter 2 – "An Angel Named Lilly"

She sighed as she opened the building door. One more sigh for the thought of going up to the 4th floor, where she and Michael lived. As she arrived at the front door of her apartment, she was really tired. She slightly banged her head against the door, thinking about the next months.

She opened the door. Michael was sitting on the couch, silent. She walked and sat next to him, giving him a kiss. His amazing blue eyes, that left Ellen totally speechless, were even sadder than in the last couple of days.

"Hi baby. How was your job interview today?" She asked, but already knowing the answer.

"I didn't get it. They wanted someone more qualified." He answered, still not moving. He finally looked at Ellen and smiled. "How was work today?"

She just looked at him. Tears started to grow in her eyes. Michael immediately understood. "Oh, God, honey, don't worry. We'll figure something out." He held her as she cried. And they stayed like that for many hours.

For the following 2 weeks, both Ellen and Michael looked for a job. They'd leave the house early in the morning and come back late at night. But, no luck. Their rent was due in 3 days and there wasn't many food left. On that night, Ellen went to bed but didn't sleep. Instead, she did a lot a thinking.

Next day, Ellen's mind was clearer. All she needed was to be realistic about her situation and do what she had to do. Her eyes were filled with tears as she realized what she had to do. She left half an hour afterwards. Michael was still asleep.

Outside, the winter was still hard to face. Ellen felt as her tears could freeze in her eyes and in her cheeks. She took a bus to the other side of town. She walked a little bit more and stopped in front of a house. "Painted in light blue… this is the place." She thought. She knocked on the door. A beautiful young woman opened the door for her. "Good morning, Ellen. I'm Lilly and I'll be with you during everything."

On those days, a woman had to be really brave to have an abortion. It wasn't easy to find a place. No one would talk about it. Usually, women did it without the knowledge of their spouses or parents, who would never support them.

Ellen had no idea what Michael would think about this baby. And now… she would never now. "Ellen, I'm going to explain the procedures for you now, ok?" Lilly woke her up from her thoughts. Less than an hour later, Ellen was ready to go, but the doctor was going to be late. She watched as Lilly went through a list, and made a few phone calls.

"How did you meet Dr. Bailey?" Ellen asked. She needed to forget what she was about to do. Maybe talking would help.

"Well, our first encounter was like the one you're having with him." She answered, as she sat next to Ellen on the couch. "Dr. Bailey was the only one who helped me when I needed. He's the father I never met."

"Do you regret it?" Ellen asked, afraid of the answer. She didn't want to have second thoughts.

"I won't lie to you and say I never think about my kid. But it was the right thing to do. But I never had second thoughts when I did it." She said, and Ellen was shaken because she felt like that woman was reading her thoughts.

Ellen looked at Lilly. The young woman was really beautiful and her eyes were as blue as Michael's eyes were. Suddenly, Ellen felt a cold shiver down her spine. She got up from the couch, and Lilly did the same. Ellen headed to the door. She then turned.

"Thank you."

Lilly smiled. "Dr. Bailey's purpose, and my purpose, is to help women. No matter how." She opened the door to Ellen.

Ellen stepped outside. Suddenly, she turned around. "Is your name really Lilly?"

"Does it matter?" The young woman smiled, and closed the door.

All Ellen had to do, is what she needed to do.

_About 5 months later….._

Michael paced the waiting room. Too many thought on his head. The rent payment – they were 3 months late. They needed to go to the supermarket – but for that, they needed money.

But then suddenly, another thought crossed his mind. He smiles. They'll work it out. They'll have to. For the baby.

"Oh my God, it hurts so much!" Ellen screams, inside a hospital room.

"Just one more push, Mrs. Rush!" said the doctor. Suddenly, a baby's scream was heard.

"Congratulations! You've got a beautiful baby girl." The nurse said to Ellen, who lied down, in the midst of happiness and relief. "You want to hold her now?"

"Sure. Can my husband come in?" Ellen asks.

"We'll call him." The nurse leaves and gets Michael. As he arrives, the other nurse has just placed the baby in Ellen's arms.

"Hey." He says. "How are you two?" He hold the little girl's hand.

"We're fine, fine. Look, Michael, she's so perfect." Ellen says. The girl opens her eyes. They're blue as Michael's.

"Have you thought about a name?" He asks.

"Lilly."

"It's a nice name. But why Lilly?"

Ellen smiles. "Because once I saw an angel named Lilly. And she changed my life."

* * *

To be continued

* * *

On the next chapter: A baby can be really expensive and demanding, and things don't get better for the Rushs in the work department. Ellen seeks relief in something that might destroy her life. A true love can resist everything… but will it? 


	3. Extreme Measures

"**Lilly & Christina"**

Chapter 3 – Extreme Measures

It was 3:00 a.m. Ellen tried to calm down Lilly, who was screaming all night. Well, little Lilly wasn't the only reason she was up. Michael hadn't arrived from work yet. Usually, he left work at midnight and was home before 1:00 a.m. But, in the last month, he was always arriving late. Ellen never smelled alcohol in his breath, but she was always sleeping when he arrived. Or pretending she was.

The last two years, after the birth of Lilly, hadn't been easy for Ellen and Michael Rush. Jumping from job to job, still living in that old building in Kensington Avenue. Their rent was always late, the electricity was rarely working, because they rarely paid for it.

Ellen wasn't working right now. The factory she worked had closed 3 weeks ago. That left Ellen a lot of free time to be wit her daughter Lilly, and with her own thoughts.

3:20 a.m. From her bedroom, she hears the door opening. Michael enters the bedroom.

"Hey baby, What you're still doing up?" He asks.

"I don't what's happening, she won't sleep." Ellen answers. Lilly has calmed down but she's still crying. Michael picks up Lilly. He lifts her up and plays with her for a while. She stops crying. "You really do some magic on her." Ellen says. He gets up from the bed and kisses Michael. He hasn't been drinking. Suspicious thoughts begin to appear on Ellen's mind. "Why did you arrive so late, baby?" She asks.

"I was working. Some extra hours." He answers, but not looking directly into Ellen's eyes. "You know, I'm new there. I have to make a good impression." He kisses her another time and leaves the room to get something to eat.

Ellen puts Lilly in her crib. She watches the little girl sleep. When she had Lilly, she felt like she had gained strength to fight all her problems. And she really did. But lately, it seemed like her strength had abandoned her. Or maybe her problems were getting bigger? She walks to the bedroom's door. Michael's still eating. She goes back inside and closes the door. She opens her small wardrobe and reaches for a bottle hidden behind Lilly's clothes. She opens the bottle and drinks directly from it. Immediately, she feels her body on fire. She looks at Lilly – who is sleeping now – and lets the tears fall.

_2 weeks later…._

Ellen opens the food cabinet in the kitchen. It's literally empty. How could she not notice they were running out of food? From the bedroom, Lilly is crying. She's hungry. Ellen opens the fridge. There's some milk, but not enough to feed Lilly. Ellen warms up the milk and gives it to Lilly. She wants more.

"I'm sorry honey… I don't have more." Ellen rocks Lilly on her arms. But her mom's lullaby won't solve Lilly's problems. Ellen makes a decision. She changes her clothes, and then Lilly's, and leaves.

She gets down to the 3rd floor and knocks in one of the doors. A 50-something woman opens the door.

"Good morning, Mrs. Turner. Can you watch Lilly today?" She asks. Lilly is still impatient and crying.

"Oh sure, my dear. Another job interview?" She asks, leading Ellen inside her apartment.

"Yeah." Ellen answers. "I hope I'll be more lucky this time."

"I'm sure you will." Mrs. Turner takes Lilly in her arms, and watches how much she's crying. "Are you hungry, my dear?" She says to the little girl.

"I gave her everything I had, but…"

"It wasn't enough. Don't worry, Ellen. Go to your interview." She opens the door to Ellen.

Ellen kisses Lilly goodbye. "Mommy will be back in a few hours." And then to Mrs. Turner, "Thank you so much, Mrs. Turner. I promise when we get back on our feet, we'll pay you for all those babysitting hours."

"Stop that. For me it's more than a pleasure to take care of this little Angel. She pays attention to what I say, smiles to me… my granddaughter never does that."

Ellen smiles. "It's the age, Mrs. Turner. I'm sure I'll get a lot of bickering from this one when she's 14."

She kisses Lilly one more time and leaves. At the street, she looks for someone. She waves as she finds her friend Cher. Cher and Ellen want to high school together. Only at that time Cher used her real name, Alice. But nowadays, she couldn't. Going by Cher avoided a lot of problems.

"Hey, Ellie!" Cher greets her happily. "How is everything?"

"As bad as they could be, Alice. My daughter is hungry and I don't food, and I don't have money." Ellen says, as they walked to an isolated corner of the street. "About that offer you made me…"

"Changed your mind?"

"I'm desperate for money. And you promised I could to do it like a one-time thing."

"Don't worry. I'll take care of everything for you. I'll get you someone really nice. Actually, he's coming to meet me in about half an hour." Cher says as she caresses her friend's hair. She knew exactly how this moment felt like. "Isn't Michael working?"

"He is, but what he ears is not enough. Or he's not bringing everything into his house." Ellen answers, on a bitter tone.

"No, Ellen, come on. Michael would never cheat on you."

Ellen watches the people passing by on the street. "And still, look what I'm doing to him."

_Meanwhile, on the other side of Philadelphia…._

Three men are sitting and drinking in a bar table.

"I don't know, man. I've been on this job for three months and it's not being worth it." Michael says as he pours himself more beer. "Today I had to leave my house without breakfast because the only thing left was my daughter's milk. I really need more money."

"Give it time, Mike. You thought you'd get into this business and three months later you'd be buying yourself a house in the suburbs and be telling your wife she doesn't need to look for a job anymore? It took me over a year to see the money really coming in." The one that answers him is Dean, a 25-year-old New York native, who, in he's free time, used his Italian looks to seduce women, going by the name of Antonio. And in his work time, he was know as Tony, the youngest man to ever command the drug business in East Philly. "Look, Mike. I like you. I see a good future for you. But I can't trust you completely after knowing you for only 3 months. Just do your job as I tell you, and you'll get what you deserve." He finishes and lights up his third cigarette in the last hour.

"Yeah, don't worry man. Anywhere you work, you have to climb your way to success and money, right? In this business, it isn't any different." says John-Paul, Tony's bodyguard and closest adviser. Paulie, as everyone called him, was a 6-feet tall black guy, who was born somewhere in Texas and came up North to search of better opportunities. "You're not telling your wife anything you shouldn't, right?"

"Of course not. She thinks I'm working at a construction site. She already has enough problems trying to survive with the money I'm giving her." Michael lights up a cigarette.

"I didn't know you smoked, Mike." Paulie says.

"Mike has finally listened to me. You need to have something that makes you forget." Tony says, tapping on Michael's shoulders. He looks at a clock on the wall. It says 11 a.m. "Come on guys. Time to work."

The three men get up and check their guns. Paulie drops some money on the table and they leave the bar. Michael is the last out. He can't believe he got himself into this life. But he couldn't stand anymore to hear his daughter crying because she was hungry, or cold, since her clothes weren't enough to keep her warm on the winter. One month after he started working with Tony, he brought her a doll. It was hard to avoid Ellen's questions and complains. "We don't have money to buy food, and you buy her a doll!" It was what she said. Little did Ellen know that Michael didn't buy that doll. Tony had his men break into the house of a client who was late on paying for the products he bought. Tony's men filled two box with things that could possibly be worth something. When Tony picked up the doll from one of the boxes, he tossed it into Michael's hands. "Here. Take this to your kid." When he saw the shine in Lilly's eyes as she hugged the doll, life leaves you nothing but extreme measures.

_Now, back to Ellen…._

Ellen felt sick as she followed that man through the motel's hall. He was Gary Booth, a 60-year-old wealthy business man, who loved paying for sex. "Sex is power, sweetie… and the woman's got the power. Until she's getting paid for it." He told Ellen as they drove to the motel.

After they got inside the room, he closed the door, and led Ellen to the bed. They sat next to each other. Gary reaches for Ellen's face. He tucks her hair behind her right ear. "So, Cher tells me this is your first gig."

"Yeah, it is." Ellen answers. She's terrified by that man's touch.

"And you got a daughter, right?" Gary says, as he touches Ellen's mouth.

"Yes, I do. She's two, and her name is Lilly."

"After we're done here, we'll go buy something for her." He says with a smile.

Ellen does her best to smile back. "Thanks."

He gets up and asks, "What do you drink?"

"The same you're having," she answers.

Gary goes back to her with a glass of scotch. She drinks it at one gulp. He looks at her for a while, and then says, "Makes it easy to forget, doesn't it?" She nods, already dizzy from the drink.

She keeps her eyes open as he kisses her. She thinks about Michael. About how much they've driven apart in the last couple of years. She used to know exactly where he was, all the time. He didn't even had to tell her. It wasn't like that anymore. And it seemed like path with no return.

Two hours later, Gary was over with her. Ellen puts her clothes on, and fights back tears. Gary gives her one-hundred dollars. She hadn't seem that amount of money in a very long time. "Now, we are getting something for your little girl. Last week I bought an adorable tea set for my nice… you think your daughter would like it?"

"Oh, I'm sure she'll love it." Ellen says, as they live the room.

About two hours later, Ellen arrives home with groceries. She picks up Lilly at Mrs. Turner house and gives her 5 dollars. Back at their apartment, Ellen gives Lilly her new tea set. They have dinner like they didn't have in many weeks. Ellen watches Lilly give some tea to her doll. Was it right to give her daughter a gift that came from where it came? She tried to make herself believe that sometimes, you have no choice but to take extreme measures.

It's around midnight when Michael arrives. Ellen welcomes him with a kiss. "You're early today. That's so great."

Michael notices the plates on the table. "How did you buy food?"

Ellen thinks for a moment. "Cher gave me money."

Michael digests that information for a moment. Usually, he didn't like that his wife was still friends with a hooker, but now, who was he to judge her? Actually, now he could see that she was just another person who didn't have another choice.

Before he could say anything, Ellen adds, "And she also bought her this tea set."

"That was really nice of her. Tell Cher I'm really grateful." Between a hurricane of thoughts, Michael manages to say something.

"Really? You always said you wanted me to keep distance of her."

"Well, our daughter is happy, isn't she?" He asks.

"Yes, she is." Ellen answers, trying to prevent any tears to appear in her eyes.

"Then it's all that matters." Michael says, embracing Ellen and kissing her on the forehead.

* * *

To be continued

* * *

On the next chapter: Ellen finds out about Michael's new business, while he suspects of her new drinking habits. And then, six years later, things are slightly better for the Rushs. Daughters Lilly and Christina seem to be growing up just fine, until a terrible thing happens. Something that will change their lives forever. 


	4. Cherry Brandy

A/N: First, I'd like to thank all my readers and reviewers, and apologize for the delay with this chapter. It was supposed to be ready on Sunday, but I didn't like what I had written and started all over again. Anyway, I have to admit it was a little disturbing to write this chapter, so I really hope you guys will enjoy it. Reviews will be very appreciated.

"**Lilly & Christina"**

Chapter 4 – Cherry Brandy

After that day, Ellen was never the same. It didn't matter that she never had to do that again. Michael had get a raise in his salary and now the Rushs have enough money for their rent, food, and clothes. They had even taken Lilly to the circus the week before. But still, six months after that day… Ellen wasn't the same.

One day, Ellen was at home, cleaning up after lunch. Lilly was next door, playing with their neighbor's son, Sam, who was about her age. Michael had just left for work, always after lunch. She was happy with the improvements of her life, but the events of six months earlier, still haunted her. What she had to do for money was ruining everything for her. She couldn't be the same with Michael anymore. It was like his touch didn't feel the same, and she didn't understand why. She still loved him, maybe even more than before. And, to make things worse, Michael didn't realize it, he didn't see that something was wrong. He always so distracted. "Work problems" It was the only thing he would say.

On their living room wall, there was a shelf with all kinds of drinks. Michael never liked to drink, but his boss would give him bottles of all varieties of drinks. Vodka, scotch, brandy. She picked up one of the bottles. Just one drink wasn't going to hurt. She closed her eyes for a minute, as she felt the relaxing effect of the drink.

A noise of keys on the front door woke her up. Michael at home at that hour? Impossible. But it was him. He had an injury in his forehead, and it was bleeding. There was another man with him.

"Leave the package here." Michael ordered the man. "Now get the hell out of here."

"Michael!" Ellen ran to him, scared. She checked his forehead. "Oh my God, this looks bad!"

Michael sat on the couch as Ellen went to get the stuff to clean his injury. "What happened, baby?" She asked.

He just looked at her and sighed. "Please, Ellen. Don't ask me anything, okay?"

She stopped cleaning his injury. "No, Michael. I'm tired of all the lies. This, in your forehead, I've seen before. When my father almost got shot. What's going on?"

Michael didn't answer. He put his hand on his forehead. It was still bleeding.

"Let's go to a hospital." Ellen said.

"No…" He said, avoiding her eyes. "I can't…"

Ellen got up from the couch. She reached for the package had left near the door. She opened it. She had seen that before. Her brother was an addict. Drug dealers had killed him a year ago.

"Michael… please tell me this is a bad dream."

"I'm sorry, Ellen… I had no choice."

"I should've discussed this with me before! I would've looked for a job… anything but this!" Ellen's eyes were full of tears. "You know what happened to my brother!"

"I'm not using it, I swear… I'm just dealing. I'm sorry, baby…but now…"

"I know." She interrupts him. "Now it's too late. Once you're there, you can never leave."

From that day on, things got worse. When Michael wasn't around, Ellen couldn't think about anything else but Michael. If he was in any danger, if he was still alive…. Lilly was too young to understand, but she surely sensed how absent her mother was. Ellen would sent Lilly to play with the neighbor the whole day. And when Lilly was at home, she would see her mom lying in the couch, almost passed away from the drinks. Lilly would sit on the couch near her mom, and Lilly knew better not to wake Ellen up in those moments. Lilly's left cheek was still hurting from when she woke her mom up and Ellen, out of control, beat her for the first time.

_Six years later…._

"Mom! I'm late for school, and there's nothing for breakfast!" The 8-year-old Lilly tried to wake up her mom. "Chris is hungry too, I can't stand her crying anymore!" In the back, we can hear the loud screams of the Rush's youngest daughter, 3-year-old Christina. She gave up after realizing that Ellen wasn't going to answer.

Lilly goes to the kitchen. Christina is sitting in one of the chairs. The little girl's face is all wet from crying and she's tired from crying. "Are you making breakfast, Lil?"

"No, Chris. Sorry. You're gonna have to wait for Dad." Lilly answers, as she puts her notebook in her backpack. She walks to Christina, picks her up and sits her on the kitchen table. "Chris, remember what we talked the other day? That you're a big girl now?" Lilly asks.

"Yes. I'm 3, I'm a big girl." Christina answers, smiling.

"So, I have to go to school, and I have to leave you with Mom again. Are you going to behave?" Lilly asks, seriously. Christina nods, many times. "What you have to do?" Lilly asks.

Christina makes a very serious face. "I have to sit on the floor, playing with my dolls. And if Mom wakes up, I say nothing, and I don't bother her no matters what happens."

"Yeah!" Lilly smiles, but it's not a totally happy smile. "You learned everything." Lilly checks the clock on the wall. "I have to go now." She puts Christina on the floor, and takes her to their parents' bedroom. Before leaving, she checks if left everything the way she's supposed to – the kitchen was clean and the daybeds she and Christina slept on were under the couch.

Outside the building, Lilly's next door neighbor and school friend, Sam Johnson, was waiting for her. Sam lived there with his mother Amanda for almost seven years. His mother chose to live in a cheaper apartment so she could give Sam better toys and better clothes.

"Hi, Sam. Sorry I'm late." Lilly says as she notices Sam's all perfect and clean clothes. Lilly's clothes were always wrinkled and old. It wasn't like her Dad didn't earn any money. Lilly would always see him giving her Mom a good amount of money to spend on the house, but Ellen would always spend the money on drinks and buy new clothes only for herself. Lilly would wear the same clothes until they didn't fit anymore – and when it happened, Christina would start wearing those clothes. Through the years Lilly had learned that she shouldn't complain to her Dad about that. First, because he always too busy with his work problems and never really paid attention. Second, because when he paid attention, it meant their parents would fight later. And third, because if their parents' fought over one of her complains, Lilly would always feel the weight of her mom's hands later. Lilly decided to get over it. "What's important is what's on the inside." She would tell herself. Yeah, right. Tell that to the other girls at school, who were always mocking Lilly for her old clothes.

"Is everything ok?" They were almost arriving at school when Sam asked that, noticing Lilly's eyes covered with tears.

"Sure, Sam. Everything's ok." She answered as they entered the school. Sam knew it was pointless to ask more. He knew the Rushs had some problems, but Lilly always refused to talk about them.

_Later, on that same afternoon….._

Lilly and Sam were arriving back home from school. Sam was really good at telling jokes and he managed to get a smile from Lilly on the way home. As they arrived at their apartments, Sam asked if she wanted to go to the park with him. Lilly said she couldn't, she was late on her homework. Actually, she was worried she had to feed Christina with the food she managed to get from school.

As she opened the door, a shocking scene appeared in front of her. Her Mom and Dad were sitting in the couch, each of them with a gun pointed to their heads. It seemed like both of them had their hands tied behind their back. Holding the guns, were her Dad's boss, Tony, and his assistant, Paulie. Lilly had seen them only a couple of times but she could never forget their angry faces.

"Oh, look who's here. We were waiting for you, little Lilly." Tony said, with his fake smile, never leaving Ellen's side. Christina was sitting on the corner of the room, scared. Her eyes were red and Lilly sensed that her sister had cried a lot; but, somehow, someone managed to shut her up.

"Leave your school stuff there, honey, and go sit near your sister." Michael stuttered.

"I give the orders here!" Tony yelled. He then lowered his voice, "First, little Lilly is going to learn her best lesson of the day. "Come here, kid."

Lilly stood still, unsure of what she should do. She glanced at Michael, who nodded to her, and she walked up to Tony. Tony observed her for a while. "You know, Lilly, you're the perfect match of your parents. You got your mom's blonde hair, and your dad's blue eyes. I really hope that, when it comes to brains, you didn't take after your stupid father."

"My father is not stupid." Lilly said, her blue eyes like darts in Tony's direction.

"I see you took his bad attitude." Tony seemed to forget Ellen for a while and concentrated only on Lilly. She was scared to death, but she was determined to be strong for her parents. Tony continued, "As you already know, your father works for me. You see, I run a very serious business. And your Dad did something he shouldn't do. He told your mother about our business. Men should never let women into their business. It's trouble. Women can't keep their tongues quiet inside their mouths. Like your mom didn't." He paused, a bit surprised on how the little girl was holding herself together.

Tony got up from the couch and paced the living room. "Now I have to teach your father a lesson. At first I thought the best way through your mother, that way I was teaching both of them a lesson. But then I realized, no. Who guarantees me he cares about that woman. She's not his blood. But you and your sister are." He seemed to have finished. He looked triumphant.

"Please, don't kill my daughters." Ellen said, in a very low voice. She knew better that to scream at those men.

"Paulie, take that woman to the bedroom. Do whatever you please with her." Tony said, with a wave of his hand.

"Are you sure you're not going to need any help around here, boss?" Paulie asked. His job was to always think of Tony first.

"Don't worry." Tony answered, laughing as he glanced from Michael to Lilly and from Lilly to Christina.

After Paulie went to bedroom with Ellen, Tony walked to Michael, who was still on the couch. Michael was sweating and on the verge of tears. "Please, do whatever you want with me, but don't hurt them."

Tony slapped him hard on the face. "Stupid. I trusted you. You were one of my closest men."

"I swear I didn't tell anything to Ellen. I don't know how Cher got that information, but Ellen wouldn't be so stupid…" He was interrupted by another slap on the face.

"Shut up." It was the only thing Tony said before walking back to Lilly. "Now, Lilly, you call your little sister. I don't think she listens to anyone but you." Lilly thought about asking him to leave Christina out, but them she thought about her mom and her dad.

"Christina, come here." Lilly said, looking at her sisters. Christina didn't move. "Come on, Chris, it's ok." Lilly said again, smiling. Christina got up and walked to where Lilly was.

Tony looked at Michael. He laughs. "Remember, Mike, when we broke into that Joe Woods' house? Remember his daughter? 16 years old, the face of a doll. The best payment I could get for all the money that idiot owned me." It was possible to see terror take Michael's face. "Remember how I told you I always had a thing for younger girls?" Tony laughs again. "You laughed with me! Ironic, isn't it?"

"No, no, you can't do that! Kill me, do anything with me, but don't touch them!" Michael yells, desperately.

"Don't you yell at me!" Tony says as he kicks Michael's stomach. He turns back to the girls. "You two. Take your clothes off."

A shiver went up and down Lilly's spine. What was that guy going to do with them? She looked at her father, looking for some hope. Michael was crying. We he felt his daughter's eyes at him, begging for help, he could do nothing but close his own eyes.

"Aren't you listening to me, stupid girl??" Tony said, grabbing Lilly's arm.

Lilly looked one more time at Michael. He was in pain. For being kicked, slapped, and tortured with small cuts all over his face. The latter was Paulie's work. He found fun in doing that.

"If I do what you want, you won't hurt my Dad anymore?" Lilly asked. Christina was holding her really tight.

Tony smiled. "No, honey. If you do what I ask, I won't anything else to your mom or your dad."

Finally, Lilly let the tears run down her face. She leaned and took off her sneakers. She then took off her blouse and pants.

"Take her clothes off too." Tony said, as he watched it. You could see, through the shine in his eyes, that he was enjoying this.

Lilly knelt down and began to take off Christina's dress. "No, Lil." The little girl complained. "I don't want to take my clothes off in front of Dad!" She whined. Lilly didn't say a word, but the tears kept rolling down her face as she took off her little sister's clothes.

The two girls stood there, in the middle of the living room, naked. Tony watched them for over five minutes before touching Lilly for the first time. Lilly's whole body was shaking as that man put his hands on her face. He then kissed her face, and Lilly felt a sweet smell of cherry brandy that made her sick.

When she felt his hands were going down, she screamed, "No! Let me go!" She escaped his embrace and dragged Christina with her. As Tony tried to grab her again and again, she kicked and pushed him. Christina had run to the corner she was sitting when Lilly first arrived. "Your stupid brat! I tell you what to do!" He tried to slap Lilly on the face but Lilly was running all around the living room.

Tony finally grabbed Lilly. He was holding her against a wall. For a moment she thought there was nothing else she could do. But suddenly, she picked up a new strength from inside. She stretched and bit Tony in the cheek. Tony started to bleed pretty bad. "You little bitch!" He exclaimed. He realized the bleeding wasn't going to stop. He knocked on the bedroom door, almost knocking it down. Paulie came out immediately.

"Boss, what happened?" Paulie asked, not even noticing the girls.

"Let's get out of here. I think they've learned their lesson." Tony said. Paulie opened the door and peeked outside. He then called Tony and they left.

Lilly looked at the apartment. It was destroyed and dirty. She walked over to her parents' bedroom. Ellen was lying on the bed. Her eyes were open but she seemed to be hypnotized. She had bruises all over her face, chest, and arms.

Lilly walked back to the living room. Michael was still crying, with his eyes closed. She opened her mouth to call "Dad" but she gave up. She sat by Christina's side on the corner of the living room and hugged her. Lilly took a deep breath and realized that Tony had left that sweet smell of cherry brandy in the air. She hugged Christina more tightly and cried.

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To be continued

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On the next chapter: The Rushs now deal with the consequences of the tragedy in their lives. What will happen to that family when Michael simply can't move on?


	5. Fairy Tales and Snow Angels

A/N: Thank you so much for the reviews. It's what keeps me writing. Keep them coming, please. Any suggestions are welcome too.

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"**Lilly & Christina"**

Chapter 5 – Fairy Tales and Snow Angels

For the rest of that day, no one said a word at the Rushs' house. Lilly gave her sister and herself a shower, and afterwards, they just went back to that little corner of the living room. Michael stayed on the couch, eyes closed. He would never look at his little girls' eyes again. Ellen didn't get up from the bed, but from the living room Lilly could hear her mother crying, like she never had. Lilly herself could do nothing but hold Christina. At that moment, everyone there was aware that their lives would never be the same again.

Next day, they went to the police station to file a report. They talked to Officer Joe Green, who listened carefully to everyone. Tony and Paulie were known in that neighborhood. Michael was completely honest, and admitted that he worked for Tony for seven years. Officer Green, however, said that it was actually better to keep Michael on the streets, since Tony could come after him again, and they could create an opportunity to arrest him.

"Mr. and Mrs. Rush, I would like to talk to your daughter Lilly alone, is that possible?" Officer Green asked.

"You're not going to make her repeat everything again, are you?" Ellen asked, holding Lilly's hand.

"I just need to clear a few details. Sometimes children react differently when their parents are not around." He answered.

"OK." Michael answered. He picked up Christina from the floor and they headed to the waiting room.

Officer Green showed a bench to Lilly. She sat down and he sat by her side. "Listen, Lilly. I know this is hard for you, but I need to be sure you told me everything that happened."

"I told everything." Lilly answered shyly. She looked to the floor. "He didn't do… what you're thinking he did."

"Ok. I believe you." Officer Green was used to see everything in that job. But seeing those things happen to little girls and boys… it was something he would never get used to.

"Do you think you're going to find him?" Lilly asked.

"I'm going to do my best." He answered, trying to give Lilly some kind of assurance. But, even though she was only eight, Lilly was very smart.

"You don't believe you're going to get him. I know, the police never catches the bad guys in our neighborhood." There was a bit of anger in Lilly's voice.

"Hey, listen to me, little girl." Officer Green said, holding Lilly arm and looking into her eyes. "We're going to get these guys. Maybe it won't be me; maybe it'll be another cop. Maybe it'll be tomorrow; maybe it'll be in 3, 5 or 10 years. But no one can run away forever."

Lilly just stared at him. Somehow that speech gave her some faith in the future. She remembered the fairy tales she liked to read. In the end, the good ones always won the bad ones and everyone was happy. But before that, the good ones had to go through a lot of sad moments. Maybe that explained. She wasn't happy now, but, who knows, maybe she was just half way in her own fairy tale.

"You can go know." Officer Green said.

Lilly got up from the bench and smiled. "Thanks."

That was one of the most truthful thanks Officer Green had ever got. "You know, Lilly, if you remember something else, or if you need to talk about what happened… you know were you can find me."

"Would you take me with you next time you are going to arrest those bad guys?" Lilly asked, and for a moment, that idea made her forget everything that happened the day before.

Officer Green laughed. That was a rather unusual request from a 8-year-old girl. "Well, I can't do that, but I could take you in one of my rounds around the neighborhood, if you want. Maybe we can "

"I won't have classes next Friday." Lilly said.

Officer Green smiled. If that's what it took to bring a smile back to that little girl's face, then it was part of his job. "Then, Officer Rush, be here at 2 p.m. sharp."

"I won't be late." She said, and left.

And that's how it started… For many Fridays, during many years, Officer Green would take young Lilly Rush for a quick round in the neighborhood. And as Lilly watched Officer Green bring some security and hope for those people who had nothing to believe in, Lilly realized that she couldn't be the helpless princess in the fairytale. She had to be strong and to fight, the one that makes sure that the good ones would win in the end.

The tragedy had brought silence to the Rushs' house. Ellen found her relief in bottles of scotch and vodka, while Lilly and Christina tried to move on with their lives, pretending that nothing ever happened. Lilly looked forward to her rounds with Officer Green and Christina was way too young to keep those memories too long in her head. But Michael couldn't find relief in anything. Now, he was out of job, so the Rushs were going through bad times again.

One Sunday, about one month after that day, Michael was sitting on the couch after lunch. Ellen was outside, smoking, and Christina was asleep. Lilly had just finished washing the dishes. She stood by the kitchen door and watched her father. Lilly knew he was responsible for what happened, but she couldn't be angry with him. She wanted her father back, that man that would play with her, and hold her in the air, that man that loved her. But she also knew that her father would never be the same, like she would never be the same either.

Lilly walked to the couch, and stood right beside Michael. "Dad," She beginned.

Michael didn't look. Lilly could see Michael fight a tear in his left eye.

"Dad," She said, reaching for his hand. "It wasn't your fault."

Michael looked at his daughter. He remembered when she was a little baby, and he could look at her big blue eyes for hours, fascinated that they were exactly like his.

There was a moment of silence, until Michael held Lilly in his arms. "I'm so sorry, my little girl!" He said, crying.

"Dad… we'll get over it." It broke Lilly's heart to see her father crying. She let a few tears fall down her face.

"I don't think I can get over it, Lilly." He said, letting go of the embrace. He looked to the other side.

"What do you mean, Dad? You have to get over it."

Michael held Lilly arms and looked at her. "Will you promise me one thing?"

"Of course." Lilly said, scared of what her father might ask her.

"Promise me that you'll always look after your mother and your sister. Even if you fight, even if they hurt you one day."

Lilly shook her head, smiling. "Dad! Mom and Chris would never hurt me." Suddenly, she realized what was going on. "Ok, Dad, I promise."

Michael kissed his daughter's forehead and got up from the couch. When he reached the door, Lilly called, "Dad."

Michael turned around. Lilly walked up to him and said. "Promise you'll be back."

Michael just looked Lilly, his eyes full of tears. He opened the door, and left.

Lilly stayed there. She tried to fight the tears. After all, she had promised to look after her Mom and her sisters. She said to the walls, "But, who's going to look after me now?"

After Michael left, things had gotten worse for the Rushs. Ellen wouldn't stay in a job for more than a few weeks. Her drinking addiction dominated her, and she would start arriving late and missing work. She got fired from all the jobs she got.

In those 5 months after Michael left, Ellen had become closer again with her old high school friend, Cher. Cher made her living out of "entertaining old rich men", as she liked to say. Ellen, except for one day a few years ago, was managing to stay away from that life, even though Cher constantly offered to her "some work."

Cher loved children, and she would bring toys and clothes to Lilly and Christina. "If you don't let me help you, please let me help them." She would say to Ellen.

One winter night, Cher arrived at the Rushs apartment. Lilly and Christina were playing while Ellen looked for something to make dinner with.

"Cher!" The girls screamed, and run to hold her. Both girls really liked her.

"Hey, Ellie." Cher said to Ellen.

"You want macaroni and cheese?" Ellen asked. "I'm making dinner."

"It certainly smells good!" Cher said, more to cheer up the girls, who ate that at least three times a week. "I'll accept, but only because I have a surprise for you, but for after dinner."

"Oh, come on Cher, what is it?" Lilly asked. "Is it in that bag?" She pointed to a bag that Cher had brought in with her.

"Dinner is on the table." Ellen said, picking up Christina and taking her to the kitchen.

"Come on. Let's eat, and then you'll know." Cher said, going to the kitchen with Lilly.

They had just finished dinner when Christina said, "The surprise!" She smiled, and clapped her hands. Lilly also looked anxious.

"Okay, let's go to the living room." Cher said. "Come on, Ellie, you too."

Lilly and Christina ran to the bad Cher had left on the couch. "First," Ellen began, "I have some new clothes for you three." She took off the bag three coats, three scarves and three colorful cloth caps. The girls put on their gifts quickly. They looked at themselves, happily.

"Here you go, Ellie." Cher handed Ellen her clothes.

"Oh Cher…I'm so ashamed." Ellen said, taking the clothes. "I can't even buy winter clothes to my daughters."

"Stop it, Ellie. I'm your friend, and I'm glad to help."

The girls held Cher, and thanked her. "Wait, girls, don't thank me yet. The best part is yet to come." Cher said, reaching inside the bag. "We are going to make home videos!" She took off a brand new camera.

"Oh my God Cher! Where did you get this?" Ellen asked, a bit worried with the possible origin of that camera.

"I worked for a person, and that person didn't have any money to pay me," Cher explained, "So that person gave me this camera as a payment."

Lilly and Christina's eyes were shining. This could possibly be the best days of their lives.

"Let's go out in the snow, shall we?" Cher suggested. I bet we can make some nice videos out there.

The girl ran to the door. "Come on!" Lilly said, and they left.

They walked to the park, two blocks away. When they arrived, Lilly and Christina started running, jumping and making faces, and Cher filmed everything happily.

"Come on, Ellie, join them." Cher said, pointing to the girls.

Ellen thought for a second, and then joined their daughters. She ran, pretending to chase them. They all laughed, happily.

Christina ran to Cher. "Can I make a film too?" She asked.

"Sure, come here," Cher said. She held the camera with one hand and picked up Christina from the floor with the other. Christina held the camera and Cher helped her.

"Come on, Ellie and Lilly." Cher said. "Make some faces to us."

Ellen and Lilly waved to the camera. "Make the snow angels!" Christina requested.

Ellen laid down on the snow. "Come on, Lilly." She said. Lilly laid down next to her mother. They started moving their arms up and down, making the snow angels. Both Lilly and Ellen were laughing. In the midst of all that joy, a few flashes came to Lilly's mind.

Her mother drunk, lying on the bed for hours. Her mother saying she's sorry, but they'll have nothing for breakfast, again. Moments when Lilly almost hated her mother.

"Oh, look at your snow angel, it's beautiful!" Ellen said, pointing to the figure behind Lilly, who was now sitting in the snow. Lilly looked at the snow angel, and smiled. She glanced at Christina, who was clapping her hands, happily.

"Come here, baby," Ellen said, opening her arms to Lilly.

Lilly ran to her mother's arms. They held each other tightly, and then began rolling in the snow, while Lilly silently prayed to her snow angels to bring her more days like this.

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To be continued

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On the next chapter: Teenage years are tough to everyone. High school, first boyfriend, career choices… now, add a drunken mother and a bitchy younger sister to the mix. It doesn't seem like a fairytale, does it? 


	6. Teenage Inferno, Part 1

"**Lilly and Christina"**

A/N: Again, thanks to all my readers and reviewers. You're the best. Due to computer problems in the last days, I had no Internet, so I used the free time to write, which explains today's big update.

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Chapter 6 – "Teenage Inferno, Part 1"

6 a.m. Lilly opened her wardrobe. She looked at her clothes and sighed. All her clothes were old and ugly. Not that she cared too much about her looks, but there was nothing there she wanted to wear in her first day of high school.

Christina walked in, looked at Lilly and her clothes, and laughed, "You're gonna be so mocked with those horrible clothes."

Lilly turned to her sister and said, coldly, "If I were you, I'd look in the mirror before opening my mouth." She smiled sarcastically, and pointed at a hole in Christina's jeans.

"This makes me look cool," Christina said, but it was easy to see that she didn't really think like that.

Lilly finally chose a pair of dark jeans and a black blouse. As she got dressed, Christina observed, enviously, her older sister's beautiful body.

"What?" Lilly asked, noticing Christina's eyes.

"I can't wait to have boobs." Christina answered, as she walked to the mirror and started to admire herself.

"Gladly, this won't happen for a couple of years. Last thing I need is having to worry about you dating all the guys in Philadelphia." Lilly said, walking to the living room, and checking her bag. She took out a comb and combed her long dark-blond hair, and then tied it into a ponytail.

"You're scared because you know I'm going to take all your boyfriends. My body is going to be a thousand times better looking than yours." Christina said, crossing her arms and standing next to Lilly.

Lilly looked at Christina, thinking that it would be actually really possible for her little sister to steal all her boyfriends, since all that Christina cared about was herself. Before she could say anything, there was a knock on the door.

"Sam, come on in." Lilly said. Sam Johnson was their next door neighbor, a handsome and tall African-american boy, and the same age as Lilly was. He worked cleaning pools at a high-society club.

"Are you ready, Lil?" Sam said as he walked in. "Hey Chris, we can walk you to school if you're ready."

"I don't need any babysitters. And I don't want to be seen with a cleaning guy. People could think we're friends." Christina answered, very rudely. She turned to go to their mom's bedroom, where they kept their clothes, but Lilly grabbed her by the arm.

"Watch your mouth, your little brat!" Lilly said, holding Christina's arm very tightly. "Pick up your stuff and go to school!"

"Let me go, bitch!" Christina yelled. "Stop bossing me around, you're not my mother!" She freed herself from Lilly.

"What's going on in there?" called a voice from the bedroom. It was Ellen. She came to the living room. "I told you not to fight, you always wake me up!" She looked at Lilly, "What do we have for breakfast?"

"Nothing, Mom." Lilly answered. "We're out of milk and bread, and you didn't leave me any money to buy anything."

Ellen looked like she couldn't believe it. "But that's impossible! I gave you the food stamps."

"Well, that was 10 days ago, Mom." Lilly replied.

"Are you sure you're not exchanging them for money, to buy new clothes?" Ellen asked Lilly.

Christina laughed. "No, I'm sure she's not doing that!"

Lilly shot Christina a very cold look. "Look, Mom, I have to go or I'll be late for school. Don't forget you start working today at that convenience store, at noon. And Chris doesn't want to go to school. As she said, I can't make her go, so maybe you could talk to her."

Christina threw herself on the couch. "No one tells me what to do."

Lilly shook her head. "Fine." She took Sam by the arm and they left.

Sam and Lilly were walking side by side in silence for a while. After a while, Sam said, "You know, Lil, we can stop by somewhere so you can have some breakfast."

"I don't have any money, Sam."

"I'll pay for you."

"I don't want you to do that. And anyway I have a feeling I'm gonna be sick today." She said, as they stood in front of their high school building.

Lilly's first day at high school went as good as possible. Math, English, and Chemistry classes. Sam wasn't in all of her classes, so she was alone most of the time. She looked around and it seemed like everyone already belonged to a group. It didn't seem like she fit in one of those groups either.

The bell rang, announcing Lilly's first day of high school was over. She went over to her locker as she picked up her stuff, two boys leaned on the lockers, one in each of her sides.

"Hey Dan," The boy on the left started. "Someone told me this school was going to be boring, but look at that."

"I know, Bobby" the boy on right continued. "We've got Barbie in person studying with us."

Lilly pretended that conversation wasn't about her, slammed her locker door closed and started to leave, but Dan stood in her way. "You know, that Barbie comment is actually a compliment." He smiled. "I'm Dan, this is Bobby."

"I'm Lilly," She answered, desperate to leave. She noticed a group of girls on the other side of the hall, watching and whispering. Great, that was she really needed. On her first day of high school, she messed with the popular girls. "I'm really need to go." She smiled to the boys. "I have a job interview in one hour."

"Oh, that's a shame. But, we'll see each other around in the next years." Dan smiled, getting out of her way. Lilly walked away as fast as she could, feeling Dan and Bobby's eyes behind her back. When she passed through the group of girls – most of whom were on her classes that day – she felt a cold shiver through her body.

Outside the building, she ran into Sam. "Hey, Lil, how was everything?"

Lilly laughed nervously. "Well, today I realized I'm not going to be a Mathematician neither a Chemist. And I have a feeling the most popular girls of this school already hate me."

"Oh. Well, then I guess you're not in the mood to hang around and get to know the surroundings better." He asked, with a sympathetic smile.

"Certainly not. But I got a job interview anyway."

"That's nice. Where?"

"At that ice-cream shop, near the park."

"I know. 'Poppy's Ice-cream Shop'." He paused and giggled. "The one where the waitresses wear that lovely pink uniform."

"Don't remind me." She laughed, and left, waving at Sam, "I'll see you later."

Two months later, Lilly was arriving home from work, late at night. She opened the apartment door and saw her mother lying on the floor, passed out, and Christina screaming by her side.

"Lil! Thank God you arrived. I can't wake her up!"

At first, Lilly wasn't that worried. "It's not the first time the booze knocked her out in the middle of the living room."

"No, it's different this time, Lil. Her hands are so cold." Christina seemed really worried, and since Lilly had never seen her sister like that, she decided to take a look at Ellen. Lilly knelt by Ellen's side and took her hand.

"She has a pulse, but it's very weak… you're right, she's so cold." She thought for a second, and decided, "We'd better take her to the hospital."

"We can't do that! She's too heavy. Let's call an ambulance." Christina said.

"Ambulances take forever to get here. Remember what happened to Mrs. Etheridge, from down the street? She died because the ambulance took one hour to arrive. The hospital is just too blocks away, we can do that." Lilly said, lifting Ellen's head.

"Let's ask Sam, he's strong."

"Yeah, now you're not ashamed to be seen next to him." Lilly said, sarcastically. She put Ellen's left arm around her shoulder, and pointed at Christina to do the same at the other side. Being considerably shorter and weaker than Lilly, Christina had a hard time doing that. "Well, he's working now. It'll have to be us." The sisters lifted up their mother and left.

A few hours later, Lilly and Christina are at the hospital. Ellen is lying on a bed, with a tube in her left arm. Christina is sitting at the edge of the bed, and Lilly is standing up by her side.

"We came as soon as we heard," Amanda Johnson said, as she entered the room with her son Sam. "How is she?"

"She's fine now," Lilly answered. "The doctors gave her something to neutralize the effect of the alcohol. But she'll need to stay here for the night."

"You girls can sleep at my house." Mrs. Johnson said, holding Christina's hand. Surprisingly, the girl didn't bitch at the offer, which would be her normal behavior. She just looked at Lilly.

"No, thanks, Mrs. Johnson, but I think it's better for us to stay here, so when the doctor discharges her, we can take her home immediately." Lilly answered.

Christina looked at Mrs. Johnson, "She's afraid the social worker is going to come."

Mrs. Johnson nodded. "I understand. But at least let me buy some food for you."

Lilly smiled. "I'm going to stay here," and looking at Christina, "But you go. Bring me something." Christina then left with Mrs. Johnson.

Now, alone with Sam and her sleeping mother, Lilly finally let herself cry. Sam put his arm around her shoulder to comfort her, but didn't say anything. He knew that he couldn't push with Lilly, he had to let her talk, whenever she felt like.

"You know, Sam, last time I came to this hospital, about a year ago, was to visit my mother's best friend, Cher. She was way worse, though. Syphilis. She was totally deformed. I always knew she was a hooker, but to watch her like that, was one of the most horrible things that ever happened to me."

"But Lil, your Mom is not a hooker. You will never see her like that."

"Sam… when my mom is drunk, she loses her senses. You have no idea of the situations I've found her in. Anything could happen to her." Lilly said, tears rolling down her face.

Sam didn't know what to say. He just hugged Lilly and let her cry.

At that moment, Christina walked in with Lilly's sandwich. Sam and Lilly broke their embrace. "Your mom is waiting for you outside." Christina said, coldly. Sam said goodbye to Lilly and left.

Christina handed her the sandwich. "You know, some people are talking. About you and Sam." She sat in the bed again.

Lilly smiled, "People talk too much." She kissed Christina's forehead and hugged her, knowing that her little sister's anger was only because she needed someone to hold her too.

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To be continued 


	7. Teenage Inferno, Part 2

"**Lilly and Christina"**

Chapter 7 – "Teenage Inferno, Part 2"

Lilly couldn't remember when was the exact moment when she started looking at Sam with different eyes. Maybe it was after that day he hugged her at the hospital. All that she knew is that, one day, about a year after that night in the hospital, they were walking from school, as Lilly happily told him about the "A" she had gotten in Math.

"Oh, Sam, I could never have done it if you hadn't tutored me."

"Stop it Lil. It was your effort. You studied so much for this." He said. He was always happy to help Lilly.

And then, suddenly, she kissed him. It was a quick kiss, and afterwards, she wasn't really sure why she had done that. It took Sam a few moments to find his voice. "What was this for?"

"I don't know. For the great guy that you are." She said, smiling embarrassed. "Well, I have to go to work. Stop by later and I'll give you free ice cream." She went to her apartment, leaving Sam speechless in the sidewalk.

And now, there she was, one more year later. She and Sam had been dating ever since that day. Lilly never thought she could have a better companion that her friend Sam, but she quickly learned that boyfriend Sam was ten times better.

She smiled to herself as she remembered the day before. It had been her 17th birthday, and Sam gave her a beautiful red rose and a necklace with a heart pendant, which she was wearing now. Suddenly, something woke her up from her daydream.

"Hey, Lil. I need to talk to you." Sam appeared in front of her.

"Things are busy today here, Sam. Is it urgent?" Lilly asked as she prepared a customer's order.

"Yeah, it is. I'll just wait until you have some time." He said, sitting in one of the counter's seats. He smiled at Lilly as she finished that order and handed the trail to the waitress. Lilly began to worry because even though Sam was smiling, he looked really sad. She started to wonder if something had happened to her mother and he was afraid to drop the bomb.

"If you don't mind talking while I clean this counter, go ahead." She said, anxious to hear whatever he had to say.

Sam sighed, and started, "Remember that I told you that my father started to call, and wanted to meet me?"

"Of course I remember," Lilly said, relieved that it wasn't any bad news about her family. "He called again?"

"Actually, he came home today. And it seems like he and my mother might get back together. He even asked us to move in with him." Sam continued.

"Sam! This is so great!" Lilly said. She was really happy for Sam, but she was starting to have a bad feeling about it. Even though Sam was telling her great news, he never smiled once.

"Yeah, it's great. But there's something…" He looked down at the counter. Lilly had finished cleaning so she was looking directly at him. She felt a shiver down her spine when she realized her bad feeling was becoming reality. "He lives in New York." Sam reached for Lilly's hand. She looked to the side, eyes full of tears.

"When are you leaving?" She asked.

"Tomorrow night." He said, his voice starting to crack. "I came here because I won't go to school tomorrow; and I don't know if I'll have time to talk to you again before I leave." He pauses. "I'm so sorry, Lil, but I have no choice."

"I understand it, Sam." She tries to smile. "Good luck in New York." She gives him a kiss on the cheek.

Unable to say another word, Sam gets up and leaves. Lilly watches him go, and wipes the tears off her eyes.

"Hey, girl, can you get our orders please?" A girl, sitting on a table with other 4 girls, waves at Lilly. Lilly sighs. The "populars" of her high school. If it wasn't enough to have them mocking at her clothes and her lack of money, now she has to serve them too. Usually that wouldn't bother her, but this wasn't a day like the other.

Lilly walked until their table. "I'm sorry for the delay, our waitresses are all busy. What can I get you?" She asked, with the same politeness she had with all the customers.

"Three chocolate chips, one vanilla, one strawberry." She said, looking at Lilly like she was a piece of dirty.

As Lilly wrote down the order, another girl said, "Tough day, Rush? Your boyfriend dumped you?"

Lilly turned to leave, but the girl said, "You're our waitress. We didn't say we were finished ordering."

Lilly turned back to the girls. "I'm sorry. Anything else?"

The five girls watched her, and they seemed amused. Another one of them, "I bet they pay you really bad here, because you're not dressing any better, you're dressing even worse."

Lilly tried to sound casual, "Well, I have a lot to worry about besides my clothes."

"Yeah, we've heard about your drunken mother." The girl who made the order laughed.

"I'm sorry, but if you're finished ordering, I need to see other customers." Lilly said, never letting the girls' words get to her.

"Yeah, go get our ice-creams," The girl waved her to go.

Lilly got back behind the counter to prepare their ice-creams. After she finished, she asked one of the other girls to take the trail. After all, she wasn't serving tables that day and she didn't need to put up with those girls again.

"You must hear all kinds of crap in this job," A girl sitting on one of the counter seats said to Lilly.

Lilly remembered seeing the girl in school. She wasn't very popular either. "Yeah, but I don't let it bother me."

"You seem bothered though." The girl said, while she ate her strawberry ice-cream. "I'm sorry if I'm being nosy, but I was already here when Sam talked to you."

"Oh," Lilly said, "Yeah, that bothered me."

"I know we're not friends, but if you need someone to talk about it… or if you need someone to put a bomb on those girls' houses… my name is Lindsey." She said, smiling.

Lilly laughed, "I'm Lilly." She was really touched by that offer of friendship. "And thanks, Lindsey. I think I'm going to accept your offer. Both of them." They both laughed.

Lindsey got up from the seat. "I have to go now. But I'll see you tomorrow at school."

Lilly smiled. "See you tomorrow."

Lilly arrived home that night feeling completely worn-out. Christina was sitting in the couch reading a magazine.

"Hey, Chris." Lilly looked into the bedroom. "Where's Mom?"

"She went out, about an hour ago." Christina answered without taking her eyes from the magazine.

"Did she say where she was going?" Lilly asked, as she searched for something inside her bag.

Christina lifted her eyes from the magazine and looked at Lilly like this was the most ridiculous question ever asked.

Lilly realized her question was indeed stupid. She took a package from her purse and handed it to Christina. "I got you this today." Lilly then sat on the couch by Christina's side.

Christina quickly dropped the magazine and grabbed the package. It was a black blouse. Simple, but nice. However, Christina didn't even smile. "This is not the blouse I liked."

"I know, but it's the only one I could afford. It's from the same store." Lilly said, not surprised by her sister's cold reaction.

"I'm so tired of always ending with the cheapest thing. Well, at least this isn't one of your old clothes." Christina said, tossing the blouse aside and picking up the magazine again.

"I know this sucks, Chris. But I'm doing the best I can right now. Why is it never enough to you?" Lilly asked.

Without taking her eyes off the magazine, Christina answered, "No one asked to look after me."

Without saying anything, Lilly got up from the couch and headed to the kitchen. She noticed some dirty dishes in the sink and started washing them.

Christina got up from the couch. She stopped by the kitchen's door. She was taken aback to see her older sister crying. In all those years, she never saw Lilly crying over something she had said to her.

"Lil, I, I…" Christina stuttered, "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to hurt you." She walked near Lilly.

"Well, saying you're sorry doesn't always fix the stupid things you do." Lilly replied, not looking at Christina.

"Well, I'm really sorry, anyway." Christina said. "But you don't seem to be crying because of me."

Lilly laughed, "I can't believe this day came. Christina Rush realized the world doesn't turn around her."

"Tell what happened. I mean, if you want to."

Lilly wiped the tears from her face, but they kept coming. "Sam's leaving."

Christina didn't quite understand. "He's leaving the building?"

Lilly looked at her sister. "He's leaving Philadelphia." By now she was crying so much she couldn't keep on doing the dishes.

"Wow, Lil…. that sucks." Christina said, feeling very stupid for her earlier attitude. She came near Lilly and put her hand on Lilly's hair, trying to comfort her.

"Leave me alone, Chris. Please." Lilly said, looking down at the sink. Christina left without saying another word.

Lilly sat at the kitchen table. She held her head on her hands and cried for the rest of the night.

_Two years later…._

It was a warm and pleasant Friday night. Lilly wasn't working that day, and she really didn't feel like staying home on her prom night. Even though she wasn't actually going to the prom. She tried to save money for the dress, but last month she had to call a plumber to check out a leaking pipe and well… she kissed her dress goodbye.

High school was finally over. Lilly wasn't sure what she was going to do now. She knew what she wanted to do, though. She wanted to be a cop. Those rounds with Officer Joe Green when she was a child made a huge impression on her. Sometimes she would hang out at the police station and watch criminals arrived after being arrested. That gave her some relief, even though she never saw the criminals who destroyed her family be arrested.

Last week she talked with Officer Green about joining the police academy. She was 18 now, she could it after graduating from high school. But this would demand full dedication from her, which meant leaving her mother and her sister alone. Even if she still lived with them, she could never watch them, and go after them whenever they needed her. Christina was only 13 now…she would probably have to postpone her career dreams for another 3 or 4 years.

It was in the middle of these thoughts that Lilly reached the park. It was the very same park where once Cher filmed Lilly with Ellen, playing in the snow. Lilly kept that tape as a treasure, even though she didn't have a VCR to play it.

Lilly stood there, with her memories, until a man's voice brought her back to Earth.

"You know, it's dangerous for a girl to come here alone at night," The guy said, stopping right in front of Lilly. Lilly was tall, but this guy was taller than she was. With the help of the moonlight, Lilly could see he had green eyes and dark hair, and was probably about her age.

"Well, I'm not alone anymore." She answered, not sure why she was trusting that stranger.

"I'm Jake Campbell." He said as he took Lilly's hand and kissed it.

Lilly smiled. "I'm Lilly Rush."

"So, what is a girl like you doing here, alone, in this wonderful night?" Jake asked.

"It's my prom night." Lilly answered, expecting Jake to ask her why she wasn't at the party, and then she would tell him a bit of her story, and he would run away like all the guys did.

He didn't ask about it though. "I can't say I'm sorry you didn't make it." He said.

Lilly felt relieved this was just going to be small talk. "What about you, Jake? What are you doing here in this desert park on a Friday night?" She asked, sitting in one of the swings.

"I don't know. I didn't feel like staying home and my feet brought me here." Jake answered, sitting on the swing next to Lilly.

Lilly looked around the park, avoiding to look at Jake. What was happening to her? She knew better than to trust in strangers.

"You know, Jake, I really need to get back home. It was nice talking to you though." She got up from the swing.

"Oh, you have to go already?" Jake said, disappointed. "We're having a nice talk."

"Yeah, but I really need to go…sorry. I'll see you around." She turned away to leave.

Jake walked after her, "Lilly, just one thing."

She turned around. "What?"

"You look amazing with the wind in your hair." He put his hands in his pockets. Lilly stayed there, he said, "That's all I wanted to say."

Lilly looked down for a while, thinking. She looked again at a Jake, and said, with a smile, "You know, you can walk me home if you want. It seems like it's going to be a windy journey."

Jake ran to catch her. "Let's go, it's getting late for a young girl to be on the streets."

After a fifteen-minute walk, they arrived in front of Lilly's building.

"So, this is where I live. Apartment 4-A" Lilly said.

"I might come back here tomorrow." Jake said, smiling.

"OK." Lilly said, not really believing he was ever going to come back.

"I'm serious."

"I'll see you tomorrow then."

"See you tomorrow." He said, and left.

Lilly waited until he turned around the corner to get inside the building. She laughed as she opened the door, pretty sure she was never going to see that guy again.

But Lilly was wrong. Jake did come back the next day. And the day after that. And the day after that day. And he kept coming back, until the days became weeks, the weeks became months, and the months became years…

* * *

To be continued 


	8. Twists

"**Lilly and Christina"**

Chapter 8 – "Twists"

"Hey, I want to use the bathroom too!" Christina yelled to Lilly. "You've been in there for hours."

"I'm almost finished." Lilly said, and unlocked the door. She came outside, "You know tonight is really important."

"I know, I know, it's your second-year anniversary with Jake. You don't need to remember me for the 100th time." Christina said, as she entered the bathroom to put on make-up.

"How do you think I look?" Lilly asked.

Christina stopped what she was doing and turned back to Lilly. "You look fine, but you don't look like you're going to celebrate your anniversary. Why don't you put on a dress?"

"We're just going to drive around for a while, and maybe have some burgers. I'll be simple. Besides that, you know I can't ride his motorcycle if I'm wearing a dress." Lilly said, as she checked her purse.

"This is something I don't get." Christina said, coming out of the bathroom. "This guy has a super cool motorcycle, but he's taking you out for burgers on your anniversary."

"I already told you, the motorcycle was a gift from his uncle." Lilly said.

Christina laughed. "Yeah, right. And those boots he gave you for Christmas, Santa Claus brought to him."

Lilly sighed, annoyed. "Why do you think you know everything?"

"Let's face it, sister, I'm a bit smarter than you."

Lilly held her sister's chin and turned her face so she could look at her eyes. "Then I guess I don't need to tell you to be careful."

"Lil, I'm fifteen. It's not like it's my first date either." Christina said, laughing.

From outside, there was the sound of a honk.

"Go, it's probably Jake." Christina said.

"Be home by 11 p.m." Lilly said, seriously, as she opened the door.

"Yeah, ok." Christina answered. Lilly closed the door and left, not sure her sister had listened to her.

Outside the building, Jake was waiting for Lilly in his motorcycle.

"Hello, beautiful!" He said, kissing her. "You look amazing."

"You always say that." Lilly says, putting her arms around his neck. "I can't trust you."

"Well, that is true. For me, you always be the most beautiful woman in the world." Jake said, kissing Lilly one more time.

"So, what was that important thing you needed to tell me?"

"Let's leave it for the end. Are you hungry?"

"Just a little."

"Well, I'm starving. Let's eat first, and then I'll take you to a special place." He said then got back on his motorcycle. Lilly hopped on behind him and they left.

After they ate, Jake drove around the neighborhood for a while.

"Where are we going, Jake?" Lilly asked after 15 minutes. "It's the third time we drive by this street."

"I thought you liked to drive around on the motorcycle." Jake said, trying to sound surprised.

"Yeah, but I'm curious to know where we are going and what are you going to tell me."

"Ok, ok." He said, turning the motorcycle around. "I can't really wait either." However, this time, he didn't say it with his usual playful tone of voice.

In less than 5 minutes, they arrived at a very familiar place.

"Here. Let's take a walk." Jake said, hopping off the motorcycle and taking Lilly's hand to help her.

"The park?" She asked, surprised.

"It's not any park, it's the park where we met. Are you disappointed?" Jake asked, taking Lilly's hand as they walked inside the park.

"No, not at all." Lilly answered, looking around. "Actually it was a nice idea. It's a meaningful place and I haven't been here in a while." She looked at Jake and kissed him on the cheek. "You can take me anywhere, even to hell, and I'll be happy, because I'll be with you."

Jake smiled, loving what he just heard. "Well, it's actually really good to hear you say something like that." He stopped as they arrived in front of the swings. He pointed one to Lilly. She sat down, and he sat on the swing by her side.

They remained quiet for a couple of minutes, until Jake said, "Did I ever mention my Uncle Bob?

"He's the one who gave you the motorcycle, isn't he?"

"Yeah, that's him. Did I tell you he's a contractor?"

"I think you mentioned it once…" Lilly said. She smiled and said, "Did you bring me here to talk about your Uncle Bob?"

"I'm getting there," He said, smiling too. "Be patient."

"Ok." She laughed. "I'm listening."

"Well, the thing is, he offered me a job." Jake said, not looking at Lilly.

"But this is great!" Lilly said, with a huge smile on her face. "This is going to be good for you, and for us."

Jake turned to Lilly, with a serious look on his face. "Well, there's a problem. It's not here in Philadelphia. It's a big project in Arizona."

Lilly's smile quickly disappeared. "Arizona? But that's so far away."

"I know Lil, and believe me, I almost didn't take it, but I had to. You know how hard it is to find a good job around here." He got up from the swing and kneeled in front of Lilly. "And with the money my uncle is going to pay me, we'll be able to buy our farm upstate and get married."

Lilly was overwhelmed with all that. She felt like there was a hurricane inside her head. "How long will you be gone?"

"Two years." Jake answered, biting his lower lip. "I can still quit. You're more important to me than anything else.

Lilly took a deep breath. "No, Jake, you should go. It'll be worth the sacrifice." It was hard for Lilly to say that, when what she really wanted to do was to beg Jake not to leave her.

"Will you wait for me?" He asked. Then he reached inside his pocket and handed Lilly a little box. Her eyes widened. She opened the box and when she saw the ring, she couldn't help crying.

"Jake... this looks so expensive…" She said, as she picked up the ring from the box. "Are you sure this isn't going to be a problem? You don't need to give me a ring to make me wait for you."

"Don't worry, baby, I took care of it." He said, holding her hands. "I sold my motorcycle."

"But you love that motorcycle!" Lilly said, surprised.

"I can't take it to Arizona with me, and when I come, I probably won't want a motorcycle anymore." He said, smiling.

Lilly shook her head, "Oh, Jake… this is the happiest and the saddest day of my life." She smiled. "And answering your question, yes, I'll wait forever for you."

Jake took the ring and put it in her finger. They kissed passionately.

"Lilly, you got a letter from Jake!" Ellen said, as she woke up her daughter.

"Mom, what time is it?" Lilly said, rubbing her eyes and taking the letter.

"It's 9, honey." Ellen said, looking at the other daybed, next to Lilly's, where Christina was sleeping. "I think I'm gonna let her sleep a little more. She came home late last night."

"Yeah, like everyday." Lilly said, getting up and heading to the bathroom. "And only God knows what she does on the street so late." She then laughed. "I have an idea though."

"Lilly, don't talk like that about your sister." Ellen said as Lilly brushed her teeth. "She's a kid, she just wants to have fun."

"Sure, but when I was her age, I was already working for two years. She needs to learn responsibility." She took Jake's letter and headed for the kitchen. "But I don't want to have that conversation now."

"Actually, me neither." Ellen said, following Lilly. "I need to talk to you."

"You certainly own me some explanation." She said, laughing, as she noticed Ellen had made breakfast and set up the table, something she hadn't done in years. "What's going on, Mom?" She said, sitting on the table and pouring some coffee.

Ellen picked up a piece of paper from above the refrigerator and handed to Lilly. "Here, look. I joined a rehab program. I realized that the alcohol is making me lose my daughters, and I don't want to happen."

Lilly was speechless. For so many times she tried to convince her Mom to get help, without success. Lilly had already given up the hope that some reason would ever come to Ellen's head. "Mom, this is wonderful. I'm really glad you decided to do this."

"So am I. But this is not going to be easy, and I'm really going to need your help." Ellen said, sitting next to Lilly and taking her hand. "I don't think I can do this alone."

"Mom, if I haven't given up on you until now, then now I certainly won't." Lilly said. "I'll be here for you. Me and Chris too."

Ellen smiled, truly happy. "Aren't you going to open your fiancé's letter?" She asked, pointing to Jake's letter on the table.

"Yeah, sure." Lilly said, opening the letter. She read it quickly, and as she reached the end, a huge smile took over her face.

"He's coming back!" She said, almost yelling. "He's coming back! Finally, after two years, I can't believe I'm going to see him again?"

"When is he arriving?" Ellen asked.

"Tomorrow, at 7 p.m." Lilly said. "I can meet him at the train station after work." She couldn't take the smile off her face. "Oh Mom, I'm so happy!"

"I'm happy for you too, baby." Ellen said, tucking Lilly's hair behind her ears. "And I hope that, from now on, you'll only have good things in your life."

Lilly smiled. It sure looked it was going to be that way. Finally.

* * *

To be continued 


	9. Once in a Lifetime

"**Lilly and Christina"**

Chapter 9 – "Once in a Lifetime"

On the next day, the hours seemed to go by slower than usual, at least for Lilly. For the last year, she'd been working as a handwriting specialist for the Philadelphia Crime Lab. After Jake left, she decided she need to do something about her work life. If he was going so far to save money so they could buy their farm upstate, and get married, she should do her part too. So, took a course, got a degree, and quickly got the job. Besides paying a lot better than her previous job, she was closer to her old dream of becoming a Police Officer. She wasn't really sure that dream would ever come true, though. If everything went well between her and Jake, she would never be able to pursue that dream. It bothered her not being able to have both things, but having Jake was certainly more important.

Lilly looked at her watch. 5.59 p.m. "Finally!" She thought, organizing the stuff on her desk and getting her purse. She usually worked overtime, but on that day she left at 6 p.m. sharp.

It took her about 40 minutes to get to the train station. She checked the platform Jake's train was going to be in, and, at 6.45 p.m., she began to wait. At first she tried to sit, but she couldn't stay still, so she paced the platform for the following fifteen minutes.

The train arrived and many people started to come out. Lilly kept looking at the train's doors, trying to find Jake. However, it was almost impossible to locate someone in the middle of so many passengers, their relatives and all the hugs between people who hadn't seen each other for a long time.

"Hello, beautiful," Lilly heard a voice from behind her. She recognized that voice immediately. She turned around and hugged Jake, probably the tighter embrace of their lives. They kissed several times.

"I'm so glad to see you," Lilly said, "I almost can't believe this day arrived."

"Me neither, baby," Jake said holding Lilly's face. "But I'm here."

"You're not leaving anymore, are you?" Lilly asked, then kissed him one more time.

Jake scratched his head. "Well… this is complicated. I'm still expecting a call from my uncle. Let's go to my parents' house, and leave my stuff there. I can't wait to hear about all you did in these two years." Jake said, taking his suitcase, and they started to walk.

"Didn't you read my letters?" Lilly asked, as Jake put his free hand around her neck.

"Of course, but I want more details. I can never get enough of you." Jake said, making Lilly smile hugely with his words.

"Everything is fine. My job is going great, my sister is going to graduate from high school, which I never thought would happen; and, you're not going to believe this, my Mom joined a rehab program." Lilly told as they walked.

"Wow, this is really great, I'm so happy for you," Jake said kissing her forehead. Lilly smiled. She was happy to have him back, but something was different. She couldn't point it if she was asked, but Jake was definitely hiding something.

Jake had been in Philadelphia for a week. Lilly was starting to feel a little disappointed because he hadn't mentioned anything about their future. Jake was still sweet and caring as he always, which made her think that maybe she was just worrying too much, like she did sometimes.

She was having dinner at Jake's house, with him and his parents, when the phone rang. Mrs. Campbell went to answer it, and much to everyone's surprise, she said, "Lilly, dear, it's for you. It's your sister."

Lilly ran to the phone, feeling her body go cold. Her mother. "Christina?" She said, worried, as she took the phone.

"Lil, I'm so sorry, but I need you." Christina began.

"Where are you?" Lilly interrupted.

"At the police station." Christina answered. Lilly was speechless. "I was at a party, and we were drinking, and the neighbors called the police. Now they want a responsible adult to take me, and I figured I'd better call you, and not mom."

Lilly took a deep breath, still not believing how far her sister had gone. "Give me the address." She said, dryly. She wrote down the address and hung up the phone. She then turned to the Campbells and said, "I'm really, but I have to go. My sister needs me."

"What happened, can we help?" Mr. Campbell asked.

"No, thanks, Mr. Campbell, I can take care of it alone." She took her coat and purse and rushed outside. Jake followed her.

"Lilly, what's going on?" Jake asked, as Lilly called a cab.

"Christina. She's in jail. She was drinking at a party. I have to go bail her out of it." Lilly said, and the initial shock was starting to turn into anger.

"Oh, my God." Jake said, shocked. "I'll go with you."

"No, Jake," Lilly shook her head. A cab stopped to pick her up. "Thanks, but I don't want to put you in the middle of this." She entered the cab and left.

Jake walked back into his house, and his mother said, "Son, you have a call from Arizona, it's your Uncle Bob." Jake sighed. He was finally going to learn about his future.

Lilly arrived at the police station about 20 minutes later. She asked the desk clerk for information, and he pointed her towards a woman down the hall.

"Excuse me," Lilly said, approaching the woman, "I'm Lilly Rush. Christina Rush's sister."

"Oh, hello," the woman said back. "I'm Michele Benedict, from Social Services."

"Social Services?" Lilly asked, surprised and also worried.

"Well, your sister is a minor, and she was found drinking alcohol. The officers reported it." Ms. Benedict answered. "Don't worry, Miss Rush. I just need to ask a few questions, and you two will be able to go."

"Sure, but where's Christina? I really would like to see her." Lilly said, looking around, trying to find Christina.

"She's inside. Let's see her. It would be better if she was present when I talked to you."

They walked into one of the interrogation rooms. Christina was sitting there, along with another girl and a police officer. "Officer Smith, will you take Miss Andrews to another room? I need to speak with Miss Rush and her sister alone." The officer did what he was told without saying a word.

"So, Miss Rush," Ms. Benedict said to Lilly, "As I said, I just want to ask a few questions, and if everything's OK you two will be free to go."

"Please go on." Lilly said to Ms. Benedict. The whole time she was in the room, she didn't look once at Christina.

"How many adults live with in the house, with Christina?" Ms. Benedict began.

"Two. Me, I'm 22, and our Mom." Lilly answered.

"But none of you were in the house tonight."

"Well, our Mom works the graveyard shift at a convenience store, and I was having dinner at my fiancé's house."

Ms. Benedict took notes and said, "You see, Miss Rush, what happened today is a very serious thing. I'm going to let Christina walk today, but if this event repeats itself, there'll be charges brought to the adult responsible for her." She pauses for a moment, "That would be you?"

Lilly nodded. "Yes. Our Mom is going through some … " She stuttered, "Personal problems right now. With our grandparents, they're very old. It'd be better if I handled the situation with Christina. I have a stable situation, I'm engaged, I have a job."

"Well, fine," Ms. Benedict said, filling out a paper. "But you'll be responsible for Christina's actions until she turns 18."

"Don't worry, Ms. Benedict." Lilly said, looking at Christina for the first time, "This won't happen again." Christina looked down when she felt Lilly's gaze.

Lilly signed all the papers she had to and they left. They were already walking for five minutes when Christina finally had the courage to say something, "I'm so sorry, Lil, I swear to God, I didn't know there was going to be alcohol in the party…"

"Shut up, Christina!" Lilly yelled. "I'm not stupid. You, on the other hand, seem to be." She kept talking as they walked. "Is this the life you want to have? Do you want to end up like Mom? Age 40 and working as a desk clerk at a convenience store? Going to AA meetings?"

Christina's eyes were full of tears. "I don't know why I do the things I do. I just want to have fun."

"Well, I think you had enough fun already." Lilly said, stopping. "Listen, tomorrow, I'm taking you for a job interview at the ice-cream shop. I heard they need a waitress there. You're going to get that job, and from then on, you're going to go to school, and go to work, and come home. You get it? You're not going to put me through this again."

Lilly had lectured Christina many times in their lives, but that was the first time that Christina didn't answer back. She just said, "OK, Lil."

And the two sisters walked the rest of their way home in complete silence.

_Three days later…_

Jake picked up Lilly at work and took her for a walk in the park.

"I don't know if I should be happy or worried about this," Lilly said as they walked.

"About what?" Jake asked.

"About you bringing me here. Every time we come together to this park something decisive happens." She said, smiling at him.

Jake laughed. He then said, seriously, "Well…I wanted you to be happy with this, but I don't think you're going to be."

Lilly felt that cold shiver down her spine. "You have to go back to Arizona? The project is not ready?"

"No, it is ready. Everything went perfectly." Jake answered, "My Uncle decided to begin a company, instead of taking only independent projects. He called me the day Christina got arrested and he offered me a managing position."

Lilly couldn't believe it. That certainly was the end of their dreams of buying a farm, but it would be a million times better for them. Why Jake wasn't happy about it? "This is amazing, Jake."

Jake looked down. "But he decided to stay in Arizona. I want you to come and live there with me. After we get married, of course."

"What about my Mom and my sister?" Lilly asked, although she already knew the answer.

"We really can't take them. At least I won't have the conditions to support you three. The city we will live in is really small and antiquated, there aren't many jobs for women."

Lilly looked down, and sighed. "I can't leave them, Jake. Not now. If I leave, my Mom will quit rehab and my sister will get more lost in life than she already is."

Jake took Lilly's hand. "We could wait a little more, and you'll come to meet me when you think they're ready to be on their own."

Lilly laughed. "I don't know if this day will ever come."

Jake shook his head. "I don't what to do, Lil. All my family is moving there, including my parents. I never thought I'd get a chance like that in my life. This is something that happens once in a lifetime." He bit his lip, "But I also know that a love like ours is something that happens only once in a lifetime too."

Lilly smiled, sadly. "At least we're lucky to meet each other. Some people go through their whole lives without meeting their one true love."

Jake had tears in his eyes. "I don't want to end this, Lil."

"We don't have to end it. Something like what we have here never ends. We will just follow our paths, and one day, who knows, we might have the chance to finish what we started." She was holding his face with her hands.

They stood in silence for a few moments.

"I think you should go no. The longer we stay here, the harder it'll be." Lilly said.

Jake nodded. "You're right. I'm leaving the day after tomorrow, so…"

"…You probably have a lot of things to see, and to prepare," Lilly completed.

Jake kissed Lilly's forehead. "Take care of yourself, fix your family. We're not over."

Lilly nodded, and smiled. "Have a good life."

"Don't say that, Lil! We'll see each other soon." Jake said, really meaning it. He kissed her one last time and turned to leave.

Lilly watched Jake walk away, and when he couldn't hear her anymore, she repeated, "Have a good life."

* * *

To be continued

* * *

On the next chapter: All experiences in our lives bring something good. Lilly finds a reason to go on with her life, and she's as happy as she can be until Christina makes the worst mistake of her life, one that Lilly might never be able to forgive. 


	10. The Strongest Love of All

A/N: Here's the last one. Thank you so much for everyone who read it. I hope you all enjoyed reading this story as much as I enjoyed writing it. Now, I'd like to hear your final reviews, please...

* * *

"**Lilly and Christina"**

Chapter 10 – "The strongest love of all"

"There's nothing in this world that's totally bad. Even at the worst times of our lives, if we wait, we'll see something good there too." The Rushs had a neighbor, a very sick old lady, who would always say that. Lilly never understood how this poor, lonely woman found the strength to believe in something like that. Obviously, this piece of wisdom acquired a whole new meaning when, two months after Jake left; Lilly found out that she was pregnant.

The people around Lilly never understood why she never called Jake and told him about the baby. Or why she never open the letters he sent her. For Lilly, the fact that she was pregnant couldn't change the course of life. She still couldn't leave Philadelphia, and Jake still wouldn't be able to come back. She was going to have that baby alone anyway, so she decided she would leave Jake out of it. A very weak explanation, she knew that, but after Grace was born, no one talked about Jake anymore.

One month before Lilly gave birth, she, Christina and Ellen moved to another apartment, on a better part of Philadelphia. The neighborhood was calm, they had good schools nearby, and the apartment had plenty of room for little Grace to explore, when she became old enough for that.

However, now that she still two months old, Grace spent most of her time sleeping, but still, she was the biggest source of concern for her young mother. Lilly had just been back to work for a week, so she had no choice but leaving Grace with Ellen during the day, and, if Lilly had to work overtime, Christina would step in as babysitter.

With Ellen in rehab and Christina doing well in her job, Lilly thought she would finally be able to think about herself for a while, for the first time in her life. Of course, now thinking about herself meant thinking about her and Grace. But Lilly didn't even have to time to celebrate when a suspicion began to haunt the Rush house again.

"Lil," Christina came out of Ellen's room, "I think Mom is drinking again." It was a sunny Sunday afternoon, and Christina was doing some cleaning, while Lilly made dinner, and Grace was sleeping.

"It can't be, Chris. I've been following her close." Lilly said, not taking her eyes off the food she was preparing.

"Well, I found this under a stack of clothes in her wardrobe." Christina said, holding out a half-empty bottle of scotch. "And it's not the only one."

Without saying anything, Lilly turned off the stove and followed Christina, who showed Lilly the bottles: scotch, vodka... Ellen had plenty of options. Lilly remained speechless for a while, then she finally said. "I can't believe this is going on. I can't deal with this right now, with Grace and everything else."

Christina and Lilly shared a look. They both knew they were thinking the same thing, but Christina was the one who said it. "You can't leave Grace with her anymore."

Lilly sat on the bed. She held her head with her hands. "What am I going to do? I can't afford daycare."

Christina sat down next to Lilly. "Let's not go crazy yet. Let's confront Mom, maybe this is all a misunderstanding."

Lilly laughed. "Oh yeah. She's keeping the bottles for a friend." She shook her head. "But I will talk to her tonight. I can't believe I have no choice but leave my baby with a drunk all day long."

Grace started crying, so their conversation was over. Lilly went to see her, while Christina was getting the table ready for dinner.

That night, they waited for Ellen until 10 p.m. They ate their dinner without Ellen. Christina went out for a walk, while Lilly stayed in the house with Grace.

"You know, baby girl," Lilly said, "I'm the worst mother you could ever had. It doesn't matter how hard I try, I can't fix this family for you." The little girl watched Lilly intently as she spoke, "I always promised myself I'd give my children a better life. But instead, you're going to grow up without a father, without enough money, in a totally dysfunctional family." Lilly wiped the tears from her eyes, "I'm sorry, Grace".

Lilly's "conversation" was suddenly interrupted by the sound of the front door being slammed open.

"Christina!" Lilly quickly yelled as she ran to the living room. But this time it wasn't Chris who had arrived "too happy" from a party.

It was Ellen. And she was crying and laughing at the same time. "Lilly!" Ellen said as she ran and hugged her daughter. Lilly easily felt the familiar smell of alcohol. "This is funny. After months of deprivation, I finally feel this pleasant feeling again. But I'm crying. Why?"

Lilly was so angry she was having a hard time finding the words to say something. "Because you know you screwed up, Mom. Again." Lilly said coldly.

"I promised I won't do this again, baby. Tomorrow I'll be sober, and I'll play with my little Gracie the whole day long."

"No, you're not!" Lilly said, walking around the living room, trying to stay away from Ellen. "I can't trust my daughter to you anymore!"

Ellen's face turned serious. Suddenly, she realized what she had done. She had been able to gain her daughters' trust again. Lilly was even trusting her to take care of her daughter. And now Ellen had just tossed all that trust in the garbage. "I swear, it was only a one time thing." She lied.

"No, it was not, Mom. Chris and I found the bottles hidden in your wardrobe."

Ellen didn't say anything. What was the point of lying? If there was one thing she knew for sure, was that her oldest daughter was not stupid. Finally, she gathered some words. "What can I do for you to forgive me, Lilly?"

"I don't know, Mom." Lilly said, shaking her head, and then walking back to her bedroom.

* * *

The following two weeks were really tense at the Rushs'. In the first days, Lilly called in sick, and covered the graveyard shift, after a week she couldn't do it anymore. Christina took a week off work to keep an eye on Ellen and on Grace during the day, but she was not happy about it.

"I need your help, Chris." Lilly said one day during breakfast. "You're entitled to this week; I talked to your boss."

"I can't believe you talked to my boss about that!" Christina yelled, going back to being the annoying brat she always was. "You didn't have this right!" She paced the kitchen. "You know, Lil, I don't like the idea of raising your kid!"

"Well I'm not asking you to do that!" Lilly said, starting to get the dishes off the table. "And I certainly never will, at least while I'm sane!" She stopped and faced Christina. "But if one day I ask you that, don't forget that I raised you."

Christina was silent for a while. "Lil, seriously, I think Mom hasn't drunk since that Sunday. We can trust her."

In the back of her head, Lilly knew Christina could be right. It really seemed like Ellen had changed more in these two weeks than in the whole last year where she went to rehab. But with Ellen's background, Lilly wasn't feeling secure enough to trust her mother again yet.

"You're taking next week off, like you promised." Lilly said, finishing what she was doing. "And then we'll see."

The next week went rather calmly. Lilly was feeling better around Ellen, but had to deal with Christina's bad attitude. For the first time in her life, Christina was feeling the weight of the problems their family had, and she definitely wanted to avoid taking responsibilities. Because she didn't want to end up like her older sister – living for other people, and never for herself.

Then, things started to come back to normal. Lilly and Christina went back to their usual working schedule, and Lilly had no choice but leaving Grace alone with Ellen during the day. She warned the neighbors and asked them to call if anything weird was going on, but that didn't make it easier for her at all.

One day, Lilly was completely swamped with work. At about 7:30 p.m., she called her house, and told Christina – who usually arrived from work at 7:00 p.m. that she was going to be late. Christina complained about taking care of Grace again, like usual, but agreed to stay. Lilly went back to her work.

Meanwhile, at the Rushs', Ellen left to work at about 8 p.m. Christina then gave Grace a bath, and fed her. The little girl quickly started to show that she wanted to sleep. Christina was more than happy with that, because it meant she could watch TV, and maybe even smoke, without having to worry about Grace – who usually slept several hours without waking up.

While Christina was getting Grace ready for bed, the little girl was playing with a rattle. Grace could barely hold that rattle, but it was her favorite toy.

"I can't believe you like that thing!" Christina said to her niece, laughing "It belonged to your mother, it's so old. I bought you a new one and you didn't even look at it."

She picked up Grace, and walked with her for a while, shaking the rattle. The little girl seemed amused by the noise made by the stuff that was inside. "Time to go to bed, now, young lady." Christina said, putting Grace in her crib.

However, Grace was really attached to the rattle, and wasn't pleased with the possibility of letting it go.

"You really like that thing, don't you?" Christina said, surprised. She wondered if a 3-month-old baby was supposed to be so attached to a toy. "Well, being your mother's daughter, you're probably precocious." She said, giving the rattle to Grace. It probably wouldn't hurt to leave it there. In a matter of two minutes, Grace was already sleeping, so there would be no problem.

Christina walked back to the living room. She picked up her bag and started looking for something. "Job is done, now, time to relax." She laughed as she pictured Lilly's face if she found out she was smoking pot. She lit up a cigarette and started smoking.

As the drug started to kick in, Christina started seeing everything different. Drunk mother, controlling older sister, crying niece, boring job, her damn life; it seemed like all those things were drifting away from her. She was able to be herself, no strings attached.

Christina was so immersed in her "trip" she didn't hear when Grace woke up, even though the living room was close to Lilly's bedroom. She didn't even hear the sound of the rattle when Grace rolled over, belly down; and kept playing with the rattle. Oh, if Lilly saw that Christina let Grace take that dirty rattle to her mouth...

* * *

"I'm home," Lilly said, noticing Christina sleeping on the couch. It was over midnight by then. The TV was on but Christina seemed to be sleeping for quite a while.

Lilly walked over to her bedroom. She went to Grace's crib to check on her, like she did everyday. She loved to stay by the side of the crib, only watching Grace's breathing movements when she was sleeping.

But Grace wasn't moving. Lilly's first though was "You're just an overworried mother", but before she could even finish that thought, she picked up Grace from the crib. The little girl wasn't breathing. The rattle was under Grace, and it seemed to be missing one of its outside pieces. All in the blink of an eye, Lilly saw herself telling Christina not long ago, "Never let her play with my old rattle. I know she likes it, but I'm afraid it's too old, and its pieces are getting loose." A wave of desperation ran through Lilly's body.

"Christina!" She screamed with all the force in her lungs, as she took Grace to her bed, and started checking on her. Grace was still warm, but she had no pulse.

Christina came running, "What's going on, why are you screaming..." She stopped, shocked, as she looked at Lilly, who was trying to do something that looked like CPR on Grace.

"What happened?" Christina said, terrified. She watched what Lilly was trying to do, and said "You're doing it all wrong!" She tried to take over but Lilly shoved her away.

"She's not breathing!" Lilly said, barely able to talk among her tears. "I think she swallowed a small piece from the rattle."

"Oh my God..." Christina started to say, her eyes now filled with tears.

"You didn't hear anything, she didn't make any noise?" Lilly asked, still trying to see if she found any foreign body on Grace's mouth.

Christina walked a few steps away, looked down, "I don't know, Lil." Lilly quickly glanced at her sister, but went back to Grace. "I was high," Christina completed.

Lilly didn't have time or a chance to digest that. She stopped her CPR attempt. She looked at Grace. No movement, no pulse, no breathing. Lilly fell on her knees on the floor, and the crying took over her.

"Why did you stop? We have to do something, let's call an ambulance!" Christina yelled, shaking Grace very gently. Christina then tried to pull Lilly up by her arm. "Come on, Lilly, we can't give up!" She tried again, her voice muffled by the tears.

Lilly didn't say a word, just shook her head. "She's gone," Lilly finally said. Christina looked one more time at Grace's inert little body; then walked away; leaned against a wall, let the tears take over her too.

* * *

It was about 1 p.m., as Lilly sat in a cafe just outside the police station. Watching families together outside always brought her a bittersweet feeling. Exactly one year had passed after her daughter's tragic death, and even though she envied those mothers who could hold their babies, she wasn't angry at life anymore.

She was angry at herself, though, for giving up. Giving up on her mother, on her sister. For leaving home so abruptly the day after Grace's death. Actually, that anger was only occasional. Most of time, she was trying to forget all the anger she still felt towards her sister. "It was just a mistake," Lilly repeated to herself. But this mistake was still stabbing her heart, day after day.

"Look at that. Officer Lilly Rush!" Joe Green said, standing by the table Lilly was sitting at. Joe was the officer who did the report and the investigation on the violent crime Lilly's family was a victim over fifteen years ago. Lilly and Joe kept in touch for many years but they hadn't seen each other in a very long time. Joe was now retired.

"Joe! It's so good to see you!" Lilly said, hugging Joe.

They sat at the table. Joe watched Lilly for a while. "So, from what I hear, you walked a rough path until you arrived here."

"Yeah," Lilly nodded, with a sad smile. "But I'm happy, you know. I learned the hard way that my family just can't be helped. But there are still a lot of people out there who need me, and I can't give up on them."

Joe smiled. "You shouldn't give up on your family either, Lilly. Your sister and your mother are all you got."

"I know. I'm not a very lucky person, never was." She replied. "I don't know Joe. One day I might forgive my sister, but I really can't do this right now. I just can't. I can't look at Christina or at my mother."

"Lilly..." Joe said, in a fatherly tone. "Everything happens for a reason. We must learn from our experiences, and not toss then in the garbage like they never meant anything."

"But I learned a lot!" Lilly said, laughing. "I learned that I shouldn't give up on my dreams for other people, especially people who don't deserve it. I learned that, no matter how hard I try, sometimes, I will fail. And most important, I found out that I have something to fight for, call it a mission, and that I can still make my life worthwhile."

"Lilly, be careful. You lost the love of your life, you lost your daughter, you don't talk to your family anymore, you even cut your beautiful hair. I know where you're headed. Don't let your work become your life."

Lilly sighed, looked around for a while. "You're right, Joe. Everything has a reason. And maybe everything that happened to me were the reasons I needed to be here, where I am today, where I believe I should be."

Joe smiled. "I have no doubts this is where you should be. I always knew, I think since from the first time I saw you, that you were meant to kick those bad guys asses."

Lilly laughed. "Thanks, Joe. You know, in spite of everything, I'm really happy with me now."

Joe glanced at his watch. "Isn't it time for the afternoon round, Officer Rush?"

Lilly smiled. "Yeah, it is." They both stood up, paid for their lunch and left the cafe. "I'm glad to see you."

They crossed the street and stood in front of the police station. "I'm glad to see you here. Where you always wanted to be." He paused. "In spite of everything." Another pause and Joe said, now smiling. "Gotta go now. Time to play with the grandkids!"

Lilly watched Joe walk away, until he disappeared on the corner. She looked at her watch. She took a longer lunch that she should have. She smiled to herself, and walked back into the police station.

* * *

THE END 


End file.
